On postponing a "Big Event"

"Why wait and burn in lust?"
--- Kuya Dave, December 10, 2008

Waste of Pink and Blue Paint

That's the very least that it is. It's a waste of taxpayer money. It means having to climb up and down stairs to cross a street where there are already traffic lights, pedestrian lanes and people with the common sense to stop and wait until they can cross the street. It means yet another eyesore in the eyesore that is most of Metro Manila.

It is the footbridge MMDA is constructing at the junction of EDSA and Ortigas Avenue.

I don't see how it will solve the traffic because it's the traffic lights not the people that cause vehicles to stop. And it's not like they'll remove those traffic lights because that would mean disaster. The vehicles have to stop. Anyone can cross safely. I've been doing so for several months already! Why the footbridge??? Bayani can probably argue it's safer for pedestrians. Duh. No one is going to cross the road unless the vehicles are at full stop courtesy of the red light. It's EDSA people. I daresay we urban walkers are not that crazy yet.

Either they needed an excuse to grease their hands with some money or someone's campaigning for the elections. Argh.

9 days to my Christmas break

Carlo and I went gift hunting in Tiendesitas last Saturday then we watched the DCBC Cantata yesterday. Mom's telling me to buy this and that for Christmas. I have to make a wishlist for the lunch party with Ilang roommates on Saturday and then figure out what to give close friends for lunch party on Sunday. I'm wondering if they decorated at home na. I'm praying our church in Pangsinan gets more volunteers for the choir. Last year, 3 people lang un kumakanta and it's kinda sad lang. I'll be home on the 23rd (woot for free ride home!).

Work is the last thing on my mind right now.

Let's all go to Mega people and drown our "wala pang 13th" sorrows there.

It's that time of the year

...when Mondays are truly Moan-days, the holiday season is the client holler-day season and when you pencil in dates for parties not because you'll be going but so you can be reminded of the life you only dream of living.

...when the work-to-do list grows and grows and your Christmas shopping list is static

...when the "tampuhan" indicator threatens to turn red

...when the weighing scale needles ambles to the west and this not from celebration food but from comfort food

Cheers to Christmas season in MR agencies.

Red wine moment

Last night, if I had me as a girlfriend, I would certainly be in a very dark mood.

They say marriage is an institution that informs you of your faults.




I say you don't have to wait for marriage.

Sino ang paborito ni Mom...?

Ang Unica Hija o ang Future Unico Hijo-in-Law?

Exhibit A
Mom (23 Oct): "Gusto pala ni Carlo ng cassava cake. Kung malapit lang ang Manila gagawan ko siya ng cassava at bibingka."

Points: Unica Hija = 0, Future Unico Hijo-in-Law = 1

Exhibit B
Mom (23 Oct): "Iuwi mo siya sa Christmas. Ipasyal natin siya sa Baguio."

Points: Unica Hija = 0, Future Unico Hijo-in-Law = 1.5
(Kalahati lang, nakapasyal na ako ng Baguio eh)

Exhibit C
(25 Oct) NO TEXT from Mom to Unica Hija! In the afternoon, while Unica Hija contemplates out loud on reasons why Mom is not replying, Future Unico Hijo-in-Law says "May date daw siya this afternoon with a friend from Insular." Aba, nade-throne na ata si Unica Hija from her position as sole textmate ni Mom.

Points: Unica Hija = 0, Future Unico Hijo-in-Law = 3
(1.5 points ito dahil mataas na posisyon itong naabot ni FUHL)

Exhibit D
Mom (25 Oct) on me and my savings: "Tama yan anak, mas appreciate ka ni Carlo kung maingat ka sa gastos." Aba, naisip ang value ko kay Carlo?

Points: Unica Hija = 0, Future Unico Hijo-in-Law = 4

Exhibit E
Mom (26 Oct): "Gagawa ulit ako ng cassava cake. Malapit lang sana si Carlo at padalhan ko sana" Eh ako po, di po ninyo padadalhan Mom?

Points: Unica Hija = 0, Future Unico Hijo-in-Law = 5

Exhibit F
Mom (28 Oct): "Kumain ako ng cinnamon kanina. paboritong paborito mo un" Hay salamat, may naalalang favorite ko.

Points: Unica Hija = 1, Future Unico Hijo-in-Law = 5

I'll admit, I have been a little jealous these past days. But it's great Mom like him that much. I just wander what he put in her drink...

Precious Moments

Me and carlo went home to Pangasinan this weekend. What a fun and filling experience it was! Wished we stayed longer!

Some of the highlights:

1. On the trip home. Carlo complained of a mouth sore and I teased him that they cook sinigang at home. I didn’t know what they’d be cooking for lunch but sure enough when we got home, pork sinigang was for lunch. But Carlo forgot all about his mouth sore and ate. And ate. And ate some more during the course of the weekend. I think he especially loved Mom’s cassava cake. If he had stayed any longer, I’m putting my money on it that he would have gained the six pounds back.

2. On the trip home. Chicken skin. Always the chicken skin on my arms. I can’t seem to get warm enough.

3. My nose about to bleed while Carlo and my mom discussed oil prices and stocks. And then my nose about to bleed when Carlo and Omar almost went into a similar same discussion.

4. Carlo discovered where I got my “I-can-do-this-myself” attitude when Mom puts away a heavy turbo broiler all by herself.

5. As my dad pulled up to the house, my mom jokingly told Carlo to go hide. Everyone had a laugh.

6. When Carlo made mano on Dad, Dad had to look twice because he thought it was Omar.

7. Over dinner. Dad slipped and asked if why we weren’t singing happy birthday to Carlo. Mom apparently forgot to coach him that they were supposed to act like they didn’t know it was his birthday. Carlo’s ears turned red. Hahaha...

8. Again over dinner. Family asked if we were born in the same year and they found out that I was a month older than Carlo. We were right about the shaving thing. Unshaven, Carlo looks more mature. Shaven he looks younger than his 24 years. Omar said “ Kaya pala mukhang mas bata kayo...” I’m assuming the unsaid words were “...kaysa kay Ate”

9. Carlo scraping the cassava cake crust off the aluminum foil. Told you he liked it.

10. After dinner. Carlo gets up to help me with the dishes and I surprise everyone including myself by saying “Upo!” in a stern voice. He promptly sits. While I was cleaning up the table, my brother tells him, “It’s not too late to back out, you know”

11. Waking up to my mom saying “Kristina gising na si Carlo” at 7AM. People. Sunday. 7AM. Carlo is such a morning person. That’s got to be the earliest I’ve been up on a Sunday in a long time. These morning people talaga o. But had some fun listening to him and mom tell stories while I sat next to Carlo at the kitchen table half asleep.

12. Slipping with calling Carlo “Hon” in front of my family. He had a couple slips too. Habits are hard to get rid of even in front of family.

13. On the way back to Manila. Family texts Carlo instead of me. It seems they have opted to communicate to the both of us through him when they know we’re together. Gee, did not expect that to happen this early.

14. On the way back to Manila. Carlo falling asleep mid-sentence. I couldn’t even understand what he was trying to say. Hahaha... But how I wish I could just freeze that moment with his cheek resting on my head and our hands clasped together.

15. On the way back to Manila. Someone cried. Good thing that was resolved quickly. Hehehe

We forgot to take pictures though. Boo.

The 15th again!

Official number of months together = 4

Unofficial number of months together = 5.5

Odds and Ends

Number of sundaes = approximately 20 (Hon, look it's not that bad!)

Number of new food places tried out = 6 (TOSH, Buddy's, Pizza Hut Bistro. Davao Tuna Grill, Sisig Hooray, Mrs Field's, World Chicken)
Number of pounds lost (him) = 6
Number of pounds gained (me) = UNDISCLOSED ahahaha
Number of pictures together = under 15 (must improve this number drastically!)
Number of plier incidents = Will update you on this after parents have met C this weekend. Hahaha
Favorite place to hang out: Ortigas Park
Our "couple" foods: sundae from McDo and Paella from Pizza Hut Bistro
Malls we've been haunting long enough to walk around blindfolded: Megamall and Galleria
Bookstores we use as hang-outs: Powerbooks Mega and Bestseller Galle

Number of times someone's feet have been stepped on...

Let's not go there. Hahaha...

Happy monthsary C!
Love you...
Meow!

Joining the Bandwagon

There seems to be a "Pastor's Wife" thing going on care of Ate Shii and Ate Happy... I'm joining the bandwagon.

But in a different sense.

I don't want to be one nor have I been entrusted to be one. I hope I never will.

I absolutely admire those women who go into it with their entire selves, those who dream and pray for such gift, those who flourish in that place. They are wonderful souls and their hearts are truly a blessing to everyone. Being a pastor's wife is a rare gift and high calling. It looks demanding but perhaps for those called to it, they find that the joy outweighs struggles. God will give His all sufficient grace where He leads us.

But I am one of those women "who evade that path" (Pastor XY's description in Ate Shii's post). I have never seriously pictured myself on that path. I want something else (want it sooo bad!) and think that my dream is a noble goal din naman (can anyone say housewife?)

But that doesn't mean God won't put me on PW path ever. But if that time does come, I'll be dragged onto it kicking and screaming.


Kicking and screaming.

Moves

A good friend it was a grab and go thing. Grab it, run like crazy with it and never look back.Seems like good advice.

It is afterall, a crazy oppurtunity. The type a lot of people would give their lives for. A near cousin to the desperate wish for some long-lost relative who suddenly dies and leaves you a fortune. I should grab it I know.

Grab it and run like crazy indeed. But I cannot discount what this race may cost. And I find no motivation to run it. I’m still trying to figure out if what I feel is a shadow of the immense fear that haunts me. I have never liked change. So many of my meticulous plans have been woven to try minimize the unpleasantness of change. And here I am faced with another "upheaval".

I believe God is above all things. The Sovereign Lord. I believe He has a perfect will. I might not always walk in that perfect path but somehow even my strays are incorporated to that perfect path. I believe that while it’s unlikely I’ll wake up to writing on my wall or bump into a bonfire of holiness along ADB Avenue*, He will direct my paths. Now to sit still. And wait in prayer.

Not something I do well. Appreciate your prayers on the decision making process. Thanks folks.

* I’m not saying this is impossible. God can choose to speak to me or any of us in supernatural ways.

Heel no!

Stalker that I am of Go Fug Yourself, I saw Victoria Beckham wearing the oddest shoes...

Before I rant on, disclaimier moment. Listen, I'm a huge HUGE fan of shoes. God knows how crazy I am about shoes and hence He has given me a good job but not too good a job that I go and buy everything I love at Aldo, CMG or VNC.

I'm all for stilettos. Painful but gorgeous things. There are few things that make me feel as glamorous I do when I'm wearing them. Add those thing on your stems and it's instant weight loss people. Instant! And oh-so-tall-tall me can pull off skirts and dresses that would look drab without heels.

But this...



It looks like one would be literally walking on tiptoe ALL THE TIME. Unless you're a ballet student, and even if you are, I doubt any woman would want to tolerate that much pain. And it's weird noh? I've noticed heels get thinner and thinner but I never thought I'd see a day when suddenly POOF! They're gone!

You won't see me running to the stores to find something like this.

Besides I got pointe shoes. Hahaha...


Take that Victoria.

Yabang ko.

Watch the mouth

Gave it this some thought last night after C said that I absolutely cannot use those words in front of the kids if ever... See, I can still sort of live with slipping every now and then with C. He's got the cleanest mouth ever but tolerates me and is mature enough to know not to imitate me. But kids? Scary accountability right there.


I learned to swear long before I became a Christian. Back then, it was somewhat cool. Now, it's simply appalling. I try naman. But when I suddenly find out that somthing happened with a project that I totally prepared for in order to avoid, first thought is "Oh S***!". When I come home late at night and the bathroom floor is flooded by roommates who don't seem to understand the concept of a shower curtain, I fire away another "Oh S**!". When I'm really , really annoyed at someone... Okay, I'll spare you that.

When you really think about it, it should be practically impossible to be unable to find a better word to describe the emotion you're trying to express. Why use a "S***!" rather than "Dude, this is the most frustrating thing ever today!". Okay, sometimes I disguise this with "Crap" which maybe sounds a little less jarring but still not kid-friendly. Maybe better to "put it nicely" as that pic says than shout bad words to a person's back (I'm not too good with confrontations).

Is it a lack of eloquence or habit?

I say habit. And perhaps that's why it's hard to watch the mouth. Habits are hard to kick. In this case, swallow. Hopefully, it gets easier in time.

For 09242008

Lessons don't come any easier

Wounds don't heal any faster
People still flow in and out of my life

But hope grows stronger
Faith a little more grounded
Joy a little less fleeting

His love never changes
His mercies is still new every day
His grace has and will be sufficient

24
Still His
Always His

Word for the month: Calvinism

Joy: uh-huh. calvinism + the art of losing = heaven
Joy: LOL
Krissy: righteousness LOL
Joy: sometimes hope is exhausting. looking out at the horizon sometimes stings the eyes. it's better to sit and acknowledge the storm or the stillness or whatever and be like, yeah I'm at this place. don't know what to do. oh well.
Krissy: LOL. uhm, i liked everything except the last bit
Krissy: "oh well"
Joy: pwede ring oh sh*t or d*mn it!
Joy: sabay untog the head
Joy: o di ba so much better than being sparkly eyed
Krissy: yes. damdamin mo ang darkness. tas biglang gulangtang kapag may light
Krissy: o di mas masaya un
Joy: yeah put on some shades while you're at it
Joy: for magnifying darkness perception
Krissy: kaysa sa "what took you so damn long light!"
Krissy: nagiging "LIGHT! YEY! what do you know, LIGHT!"
Joy: true! parang "what is this white stuff??"
Krissy: o di ba
Joy: why is it all around me???
Krissy: lovely
Joy: I know! so much better
Joy: so I think I should boost my darkness endurance
Krissy: i think this is all very daniel
Krissy: daniel and three friends
Krissy: you know... whether we live or we die
Krissy: not betting on light
Joy: uh-huh. so true
Krissy: there's possibility of light but not betting on it?
Krissy: ohhh
Krissy: this sounds oh so very dark
Krissy: LOL
Joy: LOL
Joy: but comforting at the same time
Joy: it's like saying, God, the show is yours. Take it away, brother! I'll just know, hang on and stuff and hitch a ride
Joy: and if I'm stuck in the trunk, at least you know I'm there?
Joy: LOL
Krissy: LOL
Krissy: i like it
Krissy: can i blog this?
Krissy: permission to blog
Joy: SURE

Kikay Alert!

Krissy is wannabe make-up artist and imagine her squeals when she saw this (click to follow link)...

Project Beauty: A Makeup Workshop


Krissy wants! Krissy also wonders where to get 2T without slashing out of rent and savings...

Hirap lumigaya.

sulat

ang dami kong "must blog this!" moments. pramis.

pero tignan niyo nga naman wala akong naisususlat dito na matino... ang huling post ko ay munting link love (aka parinig) lang.

ang dami kong natututunan at nararanasan ngayon. naisip ko nga minsan, kaya hindi ako nakakasulat tungkol sa mga ito ay dahil sobra sobra na ang backlog ko. ayaw ko naman isulat un nangyari nun sunday kung di ko naisulat ung nangyari nun last last sunday. at di ko maisulat un dahil... you get the point.

bakit ganun? di na lang kaya ako mag start fresh ano? mahirap ba yun?

kaso mukhang caught in the past talaga ako na bata. at di lang sa simpleng bagay katulad ng blog. nakakainis minsan kung bakit ang bagal ng proseso ng pagdeal ko sa past.

but at least i know it's possible to close the door on those demons. a small victory, but a victory nonetheless.

Semblance of Control

You know that thing where people become obsessed with something like counting the number of hairs on their head or counting Excel cells on an empty worksheet when chaos hits them? Things that give them some sense that they are still in control and the world is not collapsing around them?

Yeah. I'm there. I want to organize my already organized project files... I want to put them in these:



Available from Filed, they are nifty and cute (PINK!!!) folders that I envision myself walking into the my client's boardroom (AKA The Lion's Den) with. They will be my shield and sword for the fight, este, presentation.

Oh wait.

I think I'm confusing God with folders.

Breathe

Sometimes that's all I can do. And sometimes that's all He asks of me. Breathe and trust him for things I that are out of my hands anyway.

I feel broken again. I feel vulnerable again. All the things I don't want to be or feel, I am.

Praise the LORD, O my soul;
all my inmost being, praise his holy name.
Praise the LORD, O my soul, and forget not all his benefits-
who forgives all your sins and heals all your diseases,
who redeems your life from the pit
and crowns you with love and compassion,
who satisfies your desires with good things
so that your youth is renewed like the eagle's.

I am held.

Stalker Alert!

I will put up a counter soon! And it will register only you! Hah! You know why? Because I've been cross-posting from my Multiply account so most friends read my Multiply blog not this one... Aha! I will find out how many times you open this site! *wags finger in air*

Speaking of cross-posting, it is a little irritating to see everything is screwed up here (the picture and text are a mess) when it's all fine on my Multiply blog... I guess I have to tweak the HTML on this thing again... I dread the day I get OC enough to do that. The last time I decided to fix the porch, it took me three days. Yes, yes, I am slow with the HTML.

Tonight is the start of Octoberfest, a 120 day beer fest sponsored by the San Miguel Corporation. They shut down sections of two main roads of the Ortigas CBD so traffic has been heavy and foot traffic even heavier. Tonight, I bet it will be crazy what with Third Eye Blind playing on this stage on San Mig Ave corner Vargas. *Due to legal concerns, further comments have been removed for the protection of the author*

Tonight is also when I get my FSH and LH results back. They're testing my E1, E2, E3 (whoa, I didn't know there were 30+ kinds of estrogen---girls are really just more complex!) and testosterone. And my thyroid secretion too. But I am focused on the FSH and LH for the simple fact that they're familiar to me. FYI, FSH (Follicle stimulating hormone) and LH (luteinizing hormone) tests are done to help investigations into menstrual irregularity and fertility issues. I've heard them before on Gray's Anatomy and Private Practice, often used by fertility specialists on the shows. Hopefully, results will say that with a little hormone treatment, I will be able to have lil Krissys and lil ehem when it's time.

I'm in His hands.

The Registry

I decided to do something a little different this year. No books allowed.




Comforter. This makes me feel like a little girl again and I am kinda freezing every night because my bed is right smack in front of the AC.







A massage... Ahhh... Add foot spa and pedi... Heaven.





Avatar DVDS. Blame this item's appearance here on Kuya Butch, Junette, Carlo and that night with the cabbage salad...





Milan bag from Baby Couture. Who said these bags are for moms only?







Silver necklace with moon pendant... Because I am losing the fight to remain a night owl and am slowly morphing into a morning person... Much to someone's delight...




A chance to cook tomato-basil chicken or garlic shrimp pasta and eat it with friends while watching Avatar.

I heart L'Oreal True Match Minerals

This is not a paid advertisement.

And how I wish it was as the stuff cost me nearly my entire grocery allowance. But it is worth it.

Before I bought the stuff, I asked the attendant to swipe some on my entire face. I figure that if my skin didn't react to powder PLUS BACTERIA then that's a good sign. Observations during my two hour trial period:

1. It did not itch! My skin is pretty sensitive but it didn't itch or go red with the powder.
2. It provides good coverage. I have acne scars and I didn't expect heavy coverage. But the mineral powder did even out my skin tone.
3. It feels light, looks light. It was hard to tell that I had make-up on but at the same time you could see my skin looked fresher and I had a glow. The shade the attendant picked was a perfect match too. When your foundation mimics your skin, that's a good thing.

I was completely sold out after the two hour trial period that I bought myself the Golden Sand shade.

And I've been hearing nothing but very positive feedback since I started using it. There's something different about you... You're glowing... It's like you're wearing make-up but you're not right?

Angela's comment: "That's the s***" Apologies for profanity but when Angela says that, something must be really good!

Thank you to Sarah for braving the mineral powder world to show me it's miracles! Sarah, this stuff rocks!

Recommended Friday Reading: Stuff Christians Like

Well, the days have been going by in a blur here in the office --- get in, do work, get out --- so me thinks I'm running an automated-by-miracle-efficient process here. Yip-yey.

Was going through the archives of my favorite blogs and would like to direct you to some of my faves on Stuff Christians Like:

#333 Mayer Christianity

Okay, so it may be the first time I declare it, but I do. I love John Mayer. I have laughed to his songs and jokes in his concert CDs. I've had cry-fests while listening to his lyrics. I have done QTs to his songs (not to worry, Your Body is a Wonderland was never in that playlist). So for SCL to take him up? AWESOME AND FUNNY STUFF! See if you get the quiz all perfect.

#361 Taking God Seriously

I can seriously relate to this post. It has taken me a while to get around to, as Jon writes, "Seeing Him as someone that cares about the little things that no one else notices or as someone that collects my tears in a jar as Psalms..." So read it. And I do look forward to the day I can waterslide into His courts. Whee!

#376 Falling in Love on a Missions Trip

This I put in for DCFers although I know Kuya Butch has already forwarded it earlier in the day to DCFers. Makes for some good laughs especially if you have been to a missions trip (I haven't) and have fallen in love or seen one of your mission-mates (wow, buzz word) fall in love.

Happy, hearty weekend to you all.

In much fear and trembling

So I’ve been asked to talk at a fellowship. About sin. I spent a good part of the weekend just drowning in all of these verses in the Bible that talk about sin until thankfully Tatay Butch lent me his NBD and I had some direction. I spent the good part of yesterday’s holiday in doing first my own personal study on sin and I covered little over four pages of my bond paper sized notebook with notes.

It was a tremendous experience for me, something like finding the exact word to describe a crazy emotion or experience. The Bible being the story of redemption that it is, deals extensively with sin. I even learned there’s an entire “branch” of theology dealing with sin, Hamartiology. It is a very sobering, very heavy topic to grapple with. But God helped me a lot. I don't think you can go through a study like this and not look at yourself and how broken and unable I am to do anything good in God's eyes or how I am unworthy His love. I was sitting there in the Coffee Bean in Ortigas park. I watched the sky go from blue to rose tints to black after my study. And I began singing Amazing Grace. For it is amazing how God has chosen to rescue us out of our darkness; how Christ chose to step into the dark and hideous alley that is our world only to die to fulfill the demand of a holy God that we could never meet.

I have a bulky outline for tomorrow’s fellowship. I also know that public speaking is not a strength of mine. But I have prayed hard, studied hard and I will be myself tomorrow. That and a lot of Um's and Uh's. Bahala na si God. He seems fully capable of taken the bad stuff and turning it into something good.

Let the Dark Knight Swallow the Titanic

Okay, corny.

Anyway, I read that Dark Knight revenue has earned more than $300M to date. That's still half of the Titanic record of just over $600M but I am holding out hope that DK will shatter that record. DiCaprio or Bale? Iceberg or Joker? It's not that hard to pick the better one. And while Titanic was a repeat movie for shrieking females, DK is repeat audience is covering larger, more diverse ground from high school kids to kids at heart who pay taxes. I just hope kiddie kids stay away from this movie.

I need to watch that movie again. Joker is simply the most entertaining evil to watch. If you haven't watched it yet (I only watched it last weekend), make time to do so. As Kuya Butch said, it is worth every penny.

Or someone else's pennies if you find someone who's willing to pay for you. =P

Naisip ko lang kahapon...

Malayo ang weekend. Monday is the pits. The weekend you just got off of seems like a distant memory. The coming weekend is too abstract an idea to grasp at this point.

Malayo ang sweldo. Oh my goodness, is it only the 21st?! The 21st?! Creh-zenez!

Malayo ang pamilya. Pangasinan. Enough said.

Malayo si C. Thank You God for unlimited text option from Globe.

Mahal pa man din ang ang transpo these days.

Wanted: Picornavirus or Coronavirus

So I can make use of my sick leaves. AND maybe my upcoming NEW, UPGRADED Maxicare card. HR informed me that my health card will be upgraded because of my promotion. Just a thought. A wistful wish for a guiltless day away from work.

We've restructured the team so work we're in the transition stage. I had the pleasure of informing one client that I was no longer in charge of one of the projects. And now, I have time to do some chatting and blogging on the side. LOL.

Guys, would appreciate your prayers for Project Counselor. If you know, you know... With knowledge comes great privilege. Wink.

Warmed

Before anything else, HAPPY BIRTHDAY OMAR! Wish you plenty of bungisngis smiles, impulsive calls to yours truly and everyone in the family, and teary eyed nights from getting love letters from across the Pacific. And congratulations on graduating next year! I believe you will.

###

Yey, I’m back in what I can only call my “resurrected self”. That’s what 14 hours in bed on a Saturday can do for me. I finally feel rested, a state that’s been eluding me for the past 3 weeks. Who can ever feel rested when your dreams are of the bottles of the client’s products screaming at you? Anyway, okay Week, BRING IT ON.

One of my closest friends is resigning. Sniff. I’m still in semi-denial. Whatever that is. I wish you didn’t have to go but you do. So I wish you happiness.

#####

Just to cover all the bases… We’re an “us”. I do believe 15 days have passed since that night. And I only realized that because someone asked us last night. Hahaha… I am apparently a “guy” when it comes to remembering dates. Anyway, it has felt like it’s been on for quite some time so I’m not too conscientious about keeping track of that particular date. But I will be mushy on this thing: that I now have hands to warm my chilled ones.

####

It’s a terribly comforting and extremely loving gesture to me.

To the very bones

It seems like I just go home just to take a bath and sleep. Somewhere in between there, I feel an incredible sadness. There was even a night where I didn't even have the energy to open a water bottle.

What is burn-out?

Not So Bad Monday, Give me Five!

Usually, I wake up on Mondays and can't help groaning and trying to grab some more (read: 10 seconds more) sleep. But to day I woke up and my tummy graoned instead... Uh-oh! At sinulat talaga...

Work load wasn't so bad either. Anyone new at MR, pray and pray hard for a difficult and complicated project to be your first project. Own it, cry over it, lose sleep and maybe friends (although I hope not) over it. Work really hard at it and embrace the experience. After walking through that kind of hell, the rest of your days in MR are in the RIGHT perspective. You NEED that perspective. Trust me on this.

My sleep cycle is discombobulated and I have GOT to fix it. Trying to stay awake at 3PM is... Terrible.

I watched SATC last Saturday. Warning #1: Watching the movie will make you want to buy shoes. Warning #2: Watching the movie will make all the shoes in the mall look like UGLY, DREADFUL CREATIONS. Blue Manolo Blahniks in the closet Carrie never got to use, be mine!

Had some good shrimp last night. Totally worth the P49.50 Claritin I had to take to stop looking like a total freak. Thanks C.

Wow, this is some random post. Hahaha...

Two Steps Up the Ladder

"We're promoting you to..."

Got accelerated so I skipped a year of work as a Research Executive 1. Effective July 1, I am a Research Executive 2 and promotable to Senior Research Executive next year.

I can tell you that walking out of the conference room after getting the news without doing a petite allegro combination (pas de chat to pas be bourree, sissones in arabesque...) was a real challenge.

Thank You, thank You God!!!

Dear all at home in Pangasinan, you gotta let me take you guys out to dinner now!

I am excited. I am grateful. I am utterly terrified! But as I'm learning ever so slowly, Fear doesn't have to be my enemy.

Bursting at the seams

Lots of blessings in my life and the life of those I love lately:

• Family is safe and healthy and our home is intact after a terrible storm ripped through my home province. Still there is no electricity and water in some areas and a lot of other people have yet to recover their losses so do pray for them. Mom, really, you gotta stop worrying about the prime beef. I really just want to see you and don't care if I don't get another beef and broccoli dish there.
• Cousin Stein will be done with his PhD soon! And wedding bells may toll soon for him and Melissa... AWESOME!
• The amazing career oppurtunities I've had lately that have given me a renewed interest and passion for the industry I work in. I'm not in the dead end I thought I was in. God's reassurance for this doubter that He knows where He's leading me. The tricky part is whether I follow or not. =P
• Evaluation today. A step up the ladder. The bottom of the bottom of the food chain I am not. Bottom of the food chain na lang. I've paid my dues. Now there's someone else I can ask to proofread and translate. Oh, oh, oh! CODE PLANS be gone!
• Starting to gel with roommates! Never thought that was possible but God has a way of turning things around. Duh.
• Yams-skies is IN! I know that the journey has been hard for you dear but I know you're looking back now and thinking of how fruitful it has been. Aja!
• C is... He just is. Hahaha.

Thank You Father.

Forget Post-it (TM)

Things I absolutely adore and need for my office space and my living space (wherever that may be in the next two months) but will most probably only look at every now and then to remind myself that I am not rich and earning dollars. :(

The life organizer. Sometimes bad things happen to organized people. Be prepared for disasters, both major and minor, with the Life.doc Organizing Binder from Buttoned Up. The Life.doc Binder has eight sections including: Family Basics, Insurance, Legal, Caregiver Information (won't be needing this for a while though), In Sickness & Health (oh, this I do need!), Dollars & Sense (probably what I need most), Emergency Plan and Home Sweet Home

These? Because maybe it will make me feel better about all the files on projects I have...

And this kind of office space except in blue and purple. But since when did corporate slaves have spaces like this? :(

misty eyed

I don't think I'll forget the image of our dear Pastor Bel Magalit raise his hands to heaven, look up with tears in his eyes and saying in a broken voice "I cannot understand how a loving God can allow this to happen"

And then lower his hand and bow his head and say "But I know that He is just"

And so much more...

Amen.

Christ have mercy

The bombings in India...

The typhoon in Burma...

The earthquake in China...

Thousands dead, thousands more missing.

30 things guys should know about girls

Stolen from Angela who stole it from… who cares? The GUY (emphasis intentional) who wrote says he has a lot of experience… again who cares? But I read through it and most of it is GOOD stuff! Fave’s are in blue, comments in violet

1. Whatever you do, don't just show up at their house...they run around in their underwear just like we do

2. DON'T CHEAT ON THEM. It may seem foolproof, but girls tell each other everything about everything. Trust me, they WILL find out and you will be mud. [And do not deny when you are confronted. Coming out or confessing is the better option here]

3. Beware of every single male relative and all guy friends. Any of them would kick your ass at the drop of a hat, and a lot of them wouldn't even wait for the damn hat. [hahaha...]

4. Never miss an opportunity to tell them they're beautiful.

5. Don't refuse to kiss in front of your friends. If they laugh at you, it's because they're jealous.

6. If they slap you hard, you deserved it.

7. Don't be afraid to touch them if you want to. If they're going out with you in the first place, it's because they like being in your arms.

8. If you don't sleep with them, do not tell your friends that you did.

8.5 If you DO sleep with them, don't tell your friends that you did.

9. You can be dirty minded in private, really...most of them are not offended by it...

10. Not all of them eat like birds, a lot of them can eat like whales.

11. Most of them don't mind paying half of everything, but they do discuss these things with their friends. Realize that if you make your girlfriend pay half all the time, everyone will know about it and your friends will know you're a pussy…

11.5 Do you honestly need all your money that much? Be a man, pay all the time!

12. Every girl should eventually get three things from her boyfriend- a stuffed animal, one of his sweatshirts, and a really pretty ring. Even if it's not a serious relationship. [doesn’t have to be a sweatshirt and doesn't have to be a ring]

13. Make sure she gets home safely as often as you can. If you're dropping her off, walk her to the door. If you aren't dropping her off, call to be sure she's home safely. [to be honest, I didn’t know I wanted (neigh, utterly adored) this until someone actually did this for me]

14. If a guy is bothering her, it is your right to beat the shit out of him [even if we believe in nonviolence, we would love to watch]

15. If you're talking to a female friend of yours, pull your girlfriend closer.

16. Never, ever slap her, even if it's just in a joking way. Even if she swats you first, and says, "Oh, you're so dumb" or something, never make any gestures back.

17. Go to a chick flick once in a while. She doesn't care whether you enjoy it or not, it just matters that you went.

18. You're dead meat if you can't get along with their pets, parents, and best friends. Be prince charming to their friends, Mr. Polite to their parents, and make sure to be nice to their animals.

19. Don't flirt with their moms… That's just freaky.

20. Don't be freaked out by PMS. It's not gross, and it really does make them feel like CRAP, so be understanding.

21. If you don't like the way they drive, you do it.

22. If you're officially dating, and you're introducing her to your friends, you'd better damn well introduce her as your girlfriend.

23. Don't stress where you go for every date. They REALLY only want to be with you.

24. If they complain that something hurts, rub it for them without being asked.

25. Girls are fragile. Even if you're play fighting/wrestling, be very gentle.

26. Memorize their birthdays. You forget her birthday and you're basically screwed for life.

27. Don't marinade the cologne, but smell good.

28. Don't give her something stupid for her birthday or Christmas or Valentine's day. It doesn't have to be expensive, but it has to be meaningful. Jewelry is always nice.

29. If you think the relationship isn't going to last, don't wait to find out. It will only hurt you more if you draw it out.

30. After you've been dating for a while, realize that they really have started to trust you. When you have a girlfriend who truly trusts you, you have a lot more responsibility, privilege and control than you would think. Be careful with it, most guys would kill for that kind of power, and it can be lost in a nanosecond

Keeel me now

So Joy showed me her awesome (read Fi-erce!) pictures taken when their church went to the 100 Islands...

And I found myself utterly jealous and miserable. Dude, that amazing place is in MY province! And I've been there twice but never really taken pictures like that and never had THAT MUCH fun.

Why why why? *Bawls*

Hopscotch

Back and forth we go

Trying to stay at square one

With our pennies already on the other side

Hop hop

We laugh

Then another hop back

As I hide my sad smile

Forbidden Expectations

For a movie with Jet Li and Jackie chan, Forbidden Kingdom's plot runs too shallow. Don't expect the storyline, cinematography and music of Hero. The fight scenes are good but at after some times, they begin to wear thin on you. I liked one scene though.

Chan pours and keeps pouring tea into the main character's cup (yeah, can you believe that Chan and Li have only supporting roles int his movie?!) until it overflows. Chan asks lead character Jason (who's so full of himself), "How can you fill your cup when it is already full?" Unfortunately, the meaning was lost on Jason who proceeds to throw his tea. Hahaha...

It's a recurring lesson in my life: You can hold onto your full cup or you can trust and allow it to empty in order to see God do "immeasureably more than you can ever ask or imagine"

Project LIFE Timelines

13 days - until Payday *drools*

5 days - until you know you love me, XOXO Gossip Girl resumes *screams*

2 days - until I move into a new home *frowns*

5.5 hours - until the water supply to our village is cut off for some pipe construction along Shaw *bawls*

2.5 hours - until we meet *smiles*

1 hour - until I'm out of here (office) *woot!*

**Timelines assume that the world is not messing with me.

Surround Me

The people who work at Penshoppe Megamall must think I'm crazy. I love hanging out there. I just stand there in the middle of there store, soaking in One Republic's "Too Late to Apologize" picking out the violins, the piano, and what sounds like a drum but in the music video the guy is beating the top of an electric piano. Speaking of music video, I am hypnotized by the rotating table...

Give me my numbers!

Must say lunch is always something to look forward to. A toast to us ladies for creating sacred lunch hour.

Anyway, today was interesting. Spent a good part of my afternoon and evening figuring out formulas on this template of ours (among other things)... I tell you now folks, I am no math whiz, but I rather miss the days of college when figures swarmed in your head like busy bees. At least I knew brain cells were still alive and kicking. Most days now, I feel like they have gone into hibernation. Today, after initial panic, I embraced the stress if only to know brain was alive.

Last night was even better. *Wink* Tip: At 7Pm on weekdays, head for McDonalds El Pueblo if you're in the Ortigas CBD. All Starbucks outlets are insanely crowded and if you need to have some quality time with someone, McDonalds El Pueblo with their amazing music mix is the place.

Ich liebe dich

Mcdonalds Pearl Drive, when will you open your doors and let us have some of your wonderful fries and fantastic sundaes?

Work news: The boat is sinking BUT I can't jump off it until I get the whole 12 months and a bonus. Panic level at an all-time high but I can't let it get the better of me. Not now when I'm on my 12th month.

Home news: DUDE! It is incredibly difficult to find decent (read as affordable, near my office and ACed) housing. Just the thought of walking the entire San Miguel Ave, not to mention jepp and tricycle ride before walk... Argh! Brain is soup. So if anyone is looking for a place to live in Ortigas or is looking for a housemate (I can clean!!! I'm neat!!!), give me a buzz.

LL news: Uhhh... I realized I need some Expectations Management. Did some work in that area. So last Sunday was good. Had it's share of weird moments (Samahan kita tumingin ng swimsuit) but overall it was some good hanging out.

I feel...

...like I was run over by a garbage truck

...angry, disappointed, frustrated. Talo ko pa ang isang Psych graduate sa galing ko sa pagprobe kahapon na ala In Depth Interview pero wala akong napala. He was the perfect example of the worst kind of respondent to have in a research study.

...sad. Sad for me. Sad for him. Sad for my parents. Sad for my mentors. Sad for my friends. I don't even know how to answer my parents.

...angry at myself because here I am YET AGAIN giving more than I am given, willing to risk my neck while the other person pulls the cord that operates the guillotine, still trying my very best to be a good person and a good friend even if I want to hit him, feeling bad that he's probably feeling bad right now, ang knowing that I may not have the willpower to walk away if he took but one little step towards me.

...grateful for all those who have tried to keep me sane, who've poured out wisdom, who've prayed are are still praying, who have hurt for me, who have gently rebuked me, who basically stick by me and give me hugs and boinkies

...that God will teach me a lot through this but right now, He knows I need to grieve