To my bro:

Happy Birthday Omar!

Hey, where's the party bro?

Proust Questionnaire from Amanda

What is your most marked characteristic?
Physically, my feet; intellectually, my ability to read really quickly; personally, my tendency to laugh a lot wehen I'm depressed.

What is the quality/ies you most like in a man?
Inner Strength, Integrity and Conviction/Passion

What is the quality/ies you most like in a woman?
Inner Beauty, Inner Strength

What do you most value in your friends?
Faithfulness, Understanding, Wit, Humor

What is the trait you most deplore in yourself?
Selfishness, Being brutally honest at times.

What is your favorite occupation?
Sleep. Books. Free-flow thinking.

What is your idea of perfect happiness?
Being on the other side i.e. heaven

What do you regard as the lowest depth of misery?
Being separated from God

In which country would you like to live?
Singapore!!! Or maybe in France or the UK.

Who are your favorite writers?
Lewis, E. Elliot, Lucado, Grisham, Miller.

Who are your favorite poets?
Haven't really read a lot. But I love Emily Dickenson.

Who is your favorite hero of fiction?
Aragorn, Atticus Finch

Who is your favorite heroine of fiction?
The girl with a pearl earring, Jean Louise "Scott" Finch, Emma (Austen's girl)

Who are your favorite composers?
Oh goodness...Vivaldi? Vienna Teng? Keren Ann?

Who are your favorite painters?
Vermeer

What are your favorite names?
Julia, Joshua, Shanelle, Rachel, David...

What is it that you most dislike?
Fish? People killing other people.

Which talent would you most like to have?
The talent for painting/photographing people in such a way that the person comes alive in that two dimensional piece.

How would you like to die?
In my sleep...my hand in my bestfriend's/husband's/child's hand (whichever it may be)

What is your current state of mind?
I'm so bored. I need to have some chaos and pressure here.

What is your motto?
Never expect anything from anyone with the exception of people within the clan. It hurts less that way.

Note: I'm so bored I'm not in a mood to write...Huh...this is new.

A True Story

One day, Rockstar Genius Nellie and her sole groupee, Weird Groupee Krissy, went to the mall in search of sandals. Aside from a pair of ballet/doll sandals, Nellie walked out of the mall wearing a rockin' black blouse and new beige, all around sandals. Krissy walked out in the same red shirt she was wearing when she walked in (the shirt that had "I'm tired of everything" emblazoned on it).

When the two friends got back to their cool (blue) crib, they decided to hold a photoshoot. Because Rockstar Genuis Nellie was a rockstar genius and because she had new stuff, more photos were taken of her compared to Weird Groupee Krissy. Weird Groupee Krissy is shown here wearing Rockstar Genuis Nellie's clothes. She was a groupee, remember? Groupees do that.

What became of the photoshoot?

Check the posts below. :)

The Many Faces of Rockstar Genius Nellie

Before the photoshoot: Nellie relaxed and showing off her cool shirt and sandals



Make-up done with:



Photoshoot Director Gillian setting Rockstar Genius Nellie in a good pose:



Am I going to be stuck in this pose forever?:



The result of Photshoot Director Gillian's efforts:



Rockstar Genius Nellie has a problem:



Rockstar Genius Nellie spaced out:



Rockstar Genius Nellie meditating:



Rockstar Genius Nellie bored:



Rockstar Genius Nellie skeptical:



Rockstar Genius Nellie rules!:



Rockstar Genius Nellie enjoying herself:



At the end of her segment of the photoshoot:

Almost Famous

Pre-photoshoot: Weird Groupee Krissy before make-up session:



Oh, really? I get my own photoshoot for being the best groupee?



Oh, never mind the long wait.

I'm a patient groupee.

Rockstar Genius Nellie can take her time.



Almost ready: Weird Groupee Krissy after make-up session in which
it is painfully obvious that nothin much has changed



Weird Groupee Krissy strikes a rocker pose

but doesn't get it quite right...



Weird Groupee Krissy gets the rocker babe image right...

"My idol would be so proud of me!"



Weird Groupee Krissy

hypnotizes studio management into

doing a photoshoot of her and Rockstar Genius Nellie together.

Monsters Inc.

Beautiful People

The Usual Suspects

F.R.I.E.N.D.S. Episode 122

Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Room

Crazy/Beautiful

Something Fishy

Nellie just pointed out something.


I laughed when I saw her point

Look at me.



Do I remind you of someone?

Someone with big eyes and a big grin?

Someone like...

Dory?

Oops

Excuse my ignorance... Tea DOES contain caffeine.

Wow, I should be more ignorant more often. Lots of people respond when you make a mistake. :)

However, I did some research (should have thought of doing this before making stupid statement) and while tea does contain caffeine, this is offset by the fact that tea is good for you. It's an antioxidant, it helps your immune system and it does a whole lot more. Visit lipton.com for more information.

The next post will be good. Trust me.

Doodles

1. There is definitely something mystical with tea. I mean, the stuff hardly excites the senses because it’s basically water with some bland taste. I am, however, addicted to it. Instead of a stash of coffee, I have packets of tea now. Am now so caffeine-free that it disgusts me.

2. Every time I go to eat at the canteen, I can’t help but glare at our servers. I asked for a no-meat diet and I asked for it in the proper way but I was abruptly and somewhat rudely refused. The management said that they wouldn’t change my meals because I was the only resident they’d be cooking special meals for. If I could find about 30 other residents who wanted that kind of arrangement, maybe they’d consider it. Maybe.

3. I am tired of meat. This explains my decision to go meatless for five days a week. The canteen serves nothing much other than meat. If they did happen to include vegetables (in insignificant amounts), the poor things would be overcooked and pathetic sources of vitamins, more so of flavor. I have this craving for broccoli but I know it would take a murder threat for the canteen to serve the stuff.

4. We’re going through Romans in the Sunset Service. Pastor Dave is having a hard time teaching it to us because Romans is a difficult book. I’m looking to the next five Sundays of reading up on Romans with Pastor Dave and the rest of the folks from DCBC.

5. We held our first dorm fellowship last night and it was such a blessing. We went through Isaiah 40. I didn’t bother to give my message a title since I’ve never been good at titles. I praise God for three new ICFers: Apple, Shenna & Karolyn. :) And for letting me be here in Ilang.

6. They’ve made a movie of Memoirs of A Geisha!!! It will be released sometime December---in the US. So that means, I’ll get to watch it by February 2006 if they show it here in the Philies. It boasts of a cast that includes Chow Yun Fat, Michelle Yeoh and Zhang Ziyi. Nitta Sayuri will be played by Ziyi no less. I’ve found the book so fascinating that I have high expectations of this Oscar hopeful from Sony. No trailers available just yet.

7. Me and Nellie are off to SM to buy her a pair of sandals. This should be interesting given that I don’t really understand how she thinks I have good taste in sandals.

Homework #1

Well, it's the weekend again and I 've tons of homework thanks to my diligent professors at the School of Statistics. I love my new major. Honestly, I wonder where my dream of 18 years went all of a sudden---I'm talking about my dream of becoming a surgeon---and then I realize it's still with me, in here somewhere. I guess I just took a different route to that career or I can find other ways of satisfying the desire to heal and care that is inherent in me.

Amidst the homework load that I have, some of it imposed by my brilliant professor (Am not sarcastic. Post on them coming up) and most of it self-imposed by moi in the effort to cultivate excellence in my academic sphere, I'm starting a new "series" called Homework, an idea I got from reading Amanda's archives. The idea is that every Friday, for as long as I have Internet, I compile a list comprising of twelve items. What those twelve items are depends on what Homework is for that week. Corny? Maybe. But who cares? I certainly don't.

Homework #1:

12 Thank You's for your Roommates

1. Thanks Gillian for bearing with my hysterics when roaches appear i.e. for never killing me when I wake you up with my screams.

2. Thanks to Chele(ex-roomie) for all her DVDs

3. Thanks to Nellie for "getting" me when I whine, which happens a LOT.

4. Thanks guys for waking me up in the mornings. Without you, I'd never be able to make it to my morning classes. With all of you trying to wake me, I have only myself to blame if I don't make it to class.

5. Thanks for the fashion tips and advice. I'd be a total disaster without your taste, sense and style.

6. Thanks for bearing wiht my OC tendencies. The Lord knows how nasty I can become if things fall beneath my standards. Sorry if you guys got offended.

7. Thanks for the subtle You-go-study-NOW cues that I get from you. This item goes out to Nellie most especially.

8. Thanks for laughing at me and my jokes and eccentricities. I never found a bunch of people who made me and my weird self feel so appreciated.

9. Gilliian, thanks for all the cutting adge practical advice and the pizzas, cakes, coffee and movies.

10. Thanks for giving me water when I run out of it.

11. Thanks for all the encouragement and rebuke.

12. Thanks Nellie for making me feel beautiful last Formal Dinner.

Eeep

I’m feeling quite overwhelmed by the recent developments in my world.

Yesterday, I attended the DCF Executive Committee. I was surrounded by people who had such passion and vision for the dorms this year. They had great plans, wonderful visions and the passion to run after such visions. Everyone but me was a visionary for the dorms they lived in, everyone but me seemed to get the big dreams of God. I felt puny next to them. I honestly don’t know what the vision is for ICF this year. I don’t dream of this whole dorm getting saved, not that that isn’t possible, with God it is. Right now, the only thing I’m concerned with is reviving the fellowship by seeking out and training the next batch of Esthers. I don’t even know where to start. And I haven’t honestly gotten past the doubt in God’s placing me here as the core leader for the fellowship. I am counted among the Christian loners. I have to “beat my flesh” to attend fellowships. I am not a communicator. Most of the time, when I get the Bible, I can’t seem to come up with words to share this blessing with other people.

Aside from the inner struggle with this leadership, I’m struggling with tasks. As part of the new membership process of the org, I have to interview each member, hold three one-on-one Bible studies with each, and orient and have them sign the membership covenant. This is the part where I am somehow thankful that there are only three ladies that I’m going to tap. I’ve decided to skip interviewing the old members as I am quite sure that they are Christians (which is the objective of the interview) and that they have their theology right. So I guess, things will be okay on this side. I say I guess because I have other “issues” that don’t make it easy to budget time.

For one, I am aspiring to get that extremely elusive GWA of 1.75. I’m actually quite amazed about how grade conscious I have become since last year. I actually get really annoyed when I know I’m attending a class and I am not prepared for it. In the past, I didn’t care about whether I could recite or not. In the past, I relied on cramming. Nowadays, I don’t want to cram. So every night, something academic must be finished. Before, these were my priorities:

1) God, Family
2) Friends
3) DCBC
4) DCF
5) Fun
6) Acads

Today, the list goes:
1) God, Family
2) Friends
3) Acads
4) DCBC
5) DCF
6) Fun

Go ahead and call me anything you like.

And, in light of Mom’s job instability (more of this later), I’m considering taking up a part-time job. I’m thinking of trying tutoring again or of applying as a barista at Starbucks. This of course, takes a chunk out of my time as well.

A girl can feel overwhelmed now, can’t she?

On mom:

Mom’s the department of the Mathematics and Natural Sciences Department. She’s part of the middle management and middle management people are not included in the collective bargaining agreement. So when a bigger, more progressive school acquires the school my mom works at, she is in danger of losing her job. Which is exactly what’s going on right now. And let me tell you why right now is especially not the greatest time for this to happen:

1) All three of us kids are in college. Anyone who doesn’t know how much that costs, go…um…I don’t know…ask around? I graduate in two years. I’m the eldest.
2) Dad’s source of income isn’t reliable.
3) Mom’s near retirement age and age matters in jobs nowadays…I think.

Mom’s really upset, not just for herself but for the entire faculty. I wish I were home right now to hug her. Sniff.

PS A cockroach did the rounds in our room again. As usual, I screamed my head off. But *puffs up chest and takes proud stance* I DID NOT cry...which is what usually happens.

Meet Jeruselai...

...my new laptop. She's a Dell Latitude. Much thanks to my Uncle Rey for giving it to me. Salt is with my brother Mikhael now.

Sheer Magnificence

They made a Rent movie! Click here for trailer. When you can't catch it on Broadway, catch it on the screen. I wonder if it's as good as the Broadway musical but then I would have no point of comparison anyway.

*****
I obviously still haven't found the font color I can settle down with.

*****
I'm a little frustrated with my quiet times. When I read my Bible, there's always a sentence someplace that strikes me and makes me pause a moment and for this event I am thankful. But when I try to "unpack" the stuff, I don't get anywhere. I don't understand why the passage strikes me or why it's suddenly become fascinating for me. I feel like the Spirit's trying to teach me something there, like He's pointing at the blackboard and I'm just staring at the blackboard wondering what's written there, squinting to try makes out the words.

I feel like the Spirit is using the Socratic method and I just can't answer any of His guide questions. Plato believed that each person has stock knowledge that they just forget during the chaos of being born and in the Socratic method, the teacher simply leads the student to remember what he already knows (or something to that effect. Check his Socratic Dialogues for the whole story).

Here, my analogy runs dry. While I believe I am wired to seek God, I don't think I have this knowledge of Him. I can't answer the questions because I simply don't have the answers. I like to have answers (even in little installations) quickly. And so it is frustrating when I know I won't be able to answer it, and I'll just have to do more staring at the blackboard i.e. meditating on His Word and bringing it to the light of Christ. These spiritual disciplines truly go against the grain of my flesh. Here, I find and trust that His grace abounds and is sufficient.

*****
You know, I read the stuff I write and am amazed. You can call it narcissism. I call it God's gift.

Hangover Blues...

Don’t you just hate the day after a three-day long weekend? I practically dragged my sluggish self around campus today.

President GMA declared yesterday a non-working day in celebration of Independence Day which really took place last Sunday. When we informed our German 10 professor of this last Friday, he remarked, “For a country that is not at all rich, we sure have a lot of holidays that we don’t celebrate anyway. For example, they give us a week off during Lent, but everyone’s at the beach or partying instead of doing Christian rituals.” Good point.

Needless to say, the weekend proved to be a rather interesting one, both in the larger and more personal spheres I exist in. On larger scheme of things, the weekend was witness to another political brouhaha in our ever politically unstable nation. This former NBI guy, Ong, surfaced and said he had wiretap tapes that could prove that GMA cheated in the elections. This got the opposition and some groups calling for her and the vice president’s resignation. The Philippines is known for the People Power revolutions and last Friday seemed like another spark that could ignite the fourth installation of People Power. For the whole story, check out www.inq7.net. My mom actually wanted me to get on the next bus home because she was afraid things might get dangerous here on campus and in the capital [Note: UP holds the reputation for its activism. Rallies and activist what have you’s the norm.] I had to convince her that I was in no danger and had to promise her I would join no rallies (I never have anyway) and would not leave the campus.

Anyway, nothing came out of the panic. None of the protest rallies amounted to much. It grated my nerves when the opposition called for the president’s resignation. Just who was the alternative leader they had in mind? While GMA has a lot to answer for in regard to the controversies which are sprouting up in an alarming rate, it doesn’t mean that she resign while she’s at it. It only shakes things up more when the opposition does these things.

In my own little world, me and my roommates accomplished nothing much. We did have really good goals for the weekend but we got hooked on Sims Superstar (I’ve achieved a modest modeling career for my Sim). When we tired of that, me and Nellie obsessed over the appearance of our blogs. What we achieved during the late night tweaking of the HTML templates of our blogs is on display. This coffee-porch-cloth thingy on this page represents around eight hours of staring at the computer and trying to decode HTML. Well, I must say, I’m very pleased with the results. Nellie amazed me by staying up until 2 AM fiddling around with her blog. All this explains the absence of posts.

I enjoyed last Sunday’s service immensely. Pastor Jong gave a little rebuttal of the Da Vinci Code. I learned a lot and was really thankful for His Word. But what I really loved was worshipping among a multitude again. I’ve been away from church for three weeks (Note: My family is still Roman Catholic and I don’t get to attend services while I’m home. We don’t go to Mass either.) so it was such a blessing to be back.

I also endured two encounters with cockroaches. I hate the things. One crawled under my bed last Sunday and I went stiff with fear. Last night, another one (or perhaps the same one) appeared and went walking along the upper parts of the walls. It circled the room once before settling somewhere in the boxes on top of Nellie’s closet. As of tonight, that/those cockroach/es has/have yet to be accounted for.

Come out, come out, wherever you are cockroach…so Gillian can kill you while Nellie, Krissy and Apple scream in the background.

The school where my mom works has just been sold to another school. We're worried about what might happen to my mom's job. Please pray with us that she'll be retained and be part of the administration. I hope she doesn't get demoted. Please pray that in this time of uncertainty and shock (the president announced it today), God would just touch my mom's heart and grant her peace. I pray that this might be a venue for my mother to trust and follow Jesus Christ.

News From the Home Front

Note: I wrote this last May 26, 2005, saved it and then totally forgot about it until now. I've just installed Sims and it's taking loads of space and so I went through my files to look for stuff to delete, and what do you know, I came across this. BTW, I apologize for my lack of more sensible posts lately. I'm busy settling into my new schedule and trying to my Sims gal into a fashion model.

I got home at 10, Wednesday night. I gave myself a pat on the back for surviving the commute to the bus station. It’s never easy to catch a bus and jeepney when you’re all alone with 3 heavy bags (what I couldn’t cram into the allotted three boxes I could store at the dorm, I had to take home). This and the fact that I can’t see the bus destination cards until they zoom right past me.

My Bible and spiritual journal got a little bath. In my rush to pack things after my finals last Wednesday morning, I neglected to place my toiletries in a Ziploc. So some of the Clean and Clear Foaming Wash got onto my stuff. (Yes, I’m endorsing the product. It’s the greatest facial cleanser that I’ve tried. And trust me, I’ve tried a lot) Good thing I covered my Bible and journal in plastic cover. So all I had to do was give them a rinse.

I’m enjoying gallons of homemade mango ice cream. Our gardens have had one huge harvest and now we have an unlimited supply. My mom puts the fruit into the blender, adds cream and some sugar and creams the stuff. Then into the freezer. By the next evening, the gallon container is empty again.

Omar got kicked out of the dorm and I’m actually very proud of him. LOL, that seems weird huh? LOL. Read me out. He signed a petition and joined a rally calling for the resignation of their corrupt and vile dorm director (I can’t even begin to tell you the bad stuff that’s happened to the residents in that dorm!). Well, they lost and the vindictive director had half the residents kicked out on fabricated violations, my brother included. (I will admit though that he has one violation. But he needs two MORE to be kicked out.) My parents are really worried and have given my brother quite a scolding for what happened. It confuses me that such is their reaction when our whole lives, we’ve been brought up to fight for the things we believe are right. We’ve certainly seen our Mom go against our principals and teachers without so much as a blink of an eye if they happened to do something wrong. But then, it has occurred to me and my brother that perhaps our parents can’t afford to be as idealistic as we are. They are the ones who provide for our needs and worry for our well-being and that’s a tough job and I know they have had to make compromises. So for we keep quiet and let them vent. Omar and I talked and we realized that someday, when we have a family ourselves, perhaps practicality will win over idealism too. But, brother, for now, I am proud of you and what you did. It isn’t always easy to do the right thing and often, doing the right thing comes at a high price. I hope you find a cool boarding house. Your acads lah, do good again hah?

I watched Desperate Housewives last night and I really liked the show. I know, but goodness gracious, it’s quite entertaining. I also discovered Birds of Prey. Coolness too. Even Memories of Bali and Stained Glass couldn’t make me change the channel! Seryoso na ‘to! I also got to watch three hours of Samurai X this afternoon. My mom has been kind enough not to let me do stuff while a program I like is on. She knows how deprived I am. Hey, don’t worry, I’m still on kitchen duty.

So I have new laptop. But I am really reluctant to get this one and leave Salt with my brother. I really love, love, love Salt. Besides Salt is blue silver and this one’s black, a Dell. You know me, I’m all about aesthetics.

I’m finally getting settled down with my wavy hair. Geez, it’s taking me almost 21 years to get used to these curves! While, these strands don’t always fall the way I want them to, thick, wavy hair is cool. I admit that my hair type is the direct opposite of the current trend, but heck, when you’ve finally come to love your locks why pay for a rebonding session?

I’m having severe withdrawal syndromes. Give me an internet connection please! I’ll trade a gallon of healthy, homemade, delicious mango ice cream for it… Any takers?

Dad got another contract, this time for a group of Korean tourists. Thank You Lord!
Am a little worried over my Stat 122 grade… please, Lord… sana nakapasa (hope I passed).

NOTE: I passed my Statistics 122 with a grade of 2.25 which is wayyy better than what i've been begging God for. Thank You so much again. That grade's also the highest one that was given out in the class. Abounding grace...am so amazed (wow, that rhymes).Thank you all for your prayers. :)

Off I Go

Yey! I'm Back in UP as a Statistics major. God is so good to me!

Enlistment's been such a pain though.

First off my grievance list is the processing of my permit to transfer which took ages because the two people who needed to sign it were off campus. One of them, the head of the Physics department, was off in some lab and the other, the college secretary, was off in the island paradise of Boracay. Had to wait a week.

Then I spent an entire day without food or water and not feeling well in a queue to get my university admission slip. I was #311 in the line.

Then it was enlistment proper where almost every step starts at a queue. I lined up for my Form 5A, for enlisting in Stat courses, for enlisting in General education courses, for library clearance, for council fees, for my Form 5, for post-advising and for payment of tuition.

Somewhere in the process, I lost a pound and lots of water. Which, when you think about it, is pretty good somehow. But I'm thankful for how God sustained me through that and how He loved me despite complaints and whines flying out me almost every minute.

I've enlisted in 16 units, which translates into three statistics majors and two, unnecessary general education subjects. When I planned out my academiuc loads for the next two years, I came up with the plan of getting 15-16 units each semester of statistics subjects. See, this is my fifth year in UP and I'm done with all my general education subjects and PEs and the minimum load is 15 units. So I was thrown off center when Sir Joyce (who's a really cool, kind and hip adviser) told me that I couldn't take up these two Stat electeives I planned to take this semester because they changed the prerequisites for the courses. Arg! I was therefore left with 10 units of Stat majors and nothing else.

I wanted to take up Math electives, but as it turns out, I already took them back when I was a Physics major.

So for this semester, I have two, rather odd courses: World Music Cultures and German 10. Odd because, one, I don't like German (I'm a french/italian/spanish gal) but it was the only language course that had slots and two, what am I going to do with this music subject? It has no relation to my course and so I had a slight problem convincing my mom to pay for it. But, again, I had no choice. Well, this ought to be interesting though.

Okay, fresh start in UP calls for some fresh goals and necessary changes in my lifestyle.

Necessary changes (Lord, grace. I can't do this alone):

> Manage time wisely. No more of Scarlett O'Hara's "I'll think about it tomorrow" philosophy.
> Budget money. All three of us are in college now and mom is going nuts.
> Wake up for 7:oo am classes!!!
> Watch out for ytour health. Avoid skipping meals. And when possible, go for a jog. This is the
ninth semester I've told myself to lose weight, but hey, this semester might be different. :)
> Take care of your relationships. Listen and stop pretending to listen---Gasp! Now you all
know...
> Make good you commitments at church and in the org.
> Be intentional about my Christian spirituallity. What you reap is what you sow right?

Goals (A tad ambitious, yes, but reach for the moon so you fall among the stars right?)

> Get a GWA of 1.75 or higher and grab my first official College Scholar certificate.
> Lose weight.
> Know Him and enjoy Him even more. (tama ba na nasa goals ito?)

Hello first semester. Here I come.

am so bohemian

Your #1 Match: ISFJ

The Nurturer You have a strong need to belong, and you very loyal. A good listener, you excell at helping others in practical ways. In your spare time, you enjoy engaging your senses through art, cooking, and music. You find it easy to be devoted to one person, who you do special things for. You would make a good interior designer, chef, or child psychologist.

Your #2 Match: ISFP

The Artist You are a gifted artist or musician (though your talents may be dormant right now). You enjoy spending your free time in nature, and you are good with animals and children. Simply put, you enjoy beauty in all its forms and live for the simple pleasures in life. Gentle, sensitive, and compassionate - you are good at recognizing people's unspoken needs. You would make a good veterinarian, pediatrician, or composer.

What's Your Personality Type?