A Meeting of Two Exhausted Pilgrims

LaBelle (10/4/2006 3:44:43 PM): lam mo, nagiging manhid na ata ako sa Christian life myself
LaBelle (10/4/2006 3:44:53 PM): hindi ko maexplain
StillLimpingAlong (10/4/2006 3:45:11 PM): u don't have to. i think i get you if you got me
LaBelle (10/4/2006 3:48:36 PM): grabe parang nakakadrain ng energy
StillLimpingAlong (10/4/2006 3:48:41 PM): do you get those days where you're like "oh, oh yeah, i'm, a christian. oh, what's that? who am i? this all seems very silly."
LaBelle (10/4/2006 3:48:55 PM): true!
StillLimpingAlong (10/4/2006 3:50:16 PM): and then days when you're like "okay, bible some more, prayer some more, serve some more, maybe shut up and listen some more to God"
LaBelle (10/4/2006 3:50:21 PM): wala nang pumapasok. na-inundate na ata ako e
LaBelle (10/4/2006 3:50:36 PM): lam mo ba, I haven't personally prayed for months already. can't find the energy to do so
LaBelle (10/4/2006 3:50:48 PM): hay, I'm going to hell right?
StillLimpingAlong (10/4/2006 3:51:36 PM): you're not going to hell. we're not going to hell.
StillLimpingAlong (10/4/2006 3:52:58 PM): coz there's this crazy God who took our word on the "okay, i'm a mess. i need you. and you redeemed me. so i guess that makes you my savior and lord" thing and he's gonna dog our heels in the most maddening ways
LaBelle (10/4/2006 3:53:18 PM): that's the thing. I don't think he's dogging me anymore.
StillLimpingAlong (10/4/2006 3:53:20 PM): you still going to church?
LaBelle (10/4/2006 3:53:24 PM): sobrang numb na ako. promise
LaBelle (10/4/2006 3:53:32 PM): yes I go to church pero parang mechanical na lang
StillLimpingAlong (10/4/2006 3:53:47 PM): okay. but you're still going.
StillLimpingAlong (10/4/2006 3:54:00 PM): and you're bothered about the numbness...
StillLimpingAlong (10/4/2006 3:54:06 PM): sounds like dogging to me

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LaBelle (10/4/2006 4:07:37 PM): hay naku. don't worry about it. This too shall pass. ahaha. thanks for the encouragement. Siguro one of these days, I will have the strength to try again
StillLimpingAlong (10/4/2006 4:08:58 PM): you will. one of these days you'll wonder why you're suddenly bawling out and hugging your bible to your chest and lying down in a fetal position. it'll drive you nuts though.
LaBelle (10/4/2006 4:09:34 PM): ahahahahhaa. at least something's happening na, ehehe
StillLimpingAlong (10/4/2006 4:10:11 PM): yeah...and it'll happen to you. go get nutty!
LaBelle (10/4/2006 4:11:55 PM): gusto kong ipukpok sarili ko sa bato sometimes. parang may nadisconnect na cord sa heart and mind ko. yung sinabi mo nga dun sa blog mo na your mind knows but your heart won't feel it
LaBelle (10/4/2006 4:12:32 PM): parang ganun. you know. but then... so what?
StillLimpingAlong (10/4/2006 4:13:28 PM): oo nga so what di ba? it's just to freaking hard to do and it's making me so tired so let's just stop. let's just throw the towel in... is that how you feel?
LaBelle (10/4/2006 4:13:36 PM): yeah. just about
StillLimpingAlong (10/4/2006 4:14:18 PM): god you better make some good grafitti on the wall or the burning bush thing to get me beating myself up over you...
LaBelle (10/4/2006 4:15:56 PM): honga e
StillLimpingAlong (10/4/2006 4:15:56 PM): yeah, i think i get you.
LaBelle (10/4/2006 4:16:13 PM): yeah. *leans head against the wall*
LaBelle (10/4/2006 4:17:10 PM): pero parang hindi mo rin maatim na mag let go kasi you know how it was to be with Him. hindi na yun mai-erase ng kahit anong stagnation
StillLimpingAlong (10/4/2006 4:17:39 PM): haha!
StillLimpingAlong (10/4/2006 4:17:51 PM): and that's where it starts to get interesting...it's like tension on a cord...one side want's to give up and say so what... the other is saying 'but you've tasted the goodness of the Lord and you know this is the truth'
LaBelle (10/4/2006 4:19:57 PM): true. hindi ko na alam gagawin. parang dapa-bangon-dapa-bangon-dapa-bangon 24/7. tapos there's a point na parang "ano ba yan." mag-aapologize na lang ba ako sa Lord forever?
StillLimpingAlong (10/4/2006 4:21:38 PM): haha..hirap gawin
StillLimpingAlong (10/4/2006 4:22:31 PM): ei, i really really have to go. so sorry. write/text/anything if u wanna. just know that you're not crazy or anything.
LaBelle (10/4/2006 4:23:41 PM): sureness! thanks!
StillLimpingAlong (10/4/2006 4:23:49 PM): thank you too
StillLimpingAlong (10/4/2006 4:24:13 PM): i'll be out looking for divine grafitti. i'll let you know when i find any. LaBelle (10/4/2006 4:24:23 PM): yes please! ahaahah