Delight

I finally punched out for the last time at NSCB. Hay, it's sheer relief not to be an intern. I didn't even mind the long commute home. My stay there was really hectic and demanding. I'm so glad that the alarm clock won't ring at 6:30Am tomorrow.

I'm also so lucky that my Auntie and Uncle have offered to drive me home in their car. I didn't have to buy a bus ticket in advance and I don't have to deal with the stress of crowded stations and buses.

Mom's beginning to worry less about most of the things that used to send her blood pressure sky high. She said in one text message to me, "Nina, if God said He'd provide, I think I'll trust that. his will be done." Good things are definitely happening.

I passed all my subjects with better grades than I hoped for, especially in my Statistics 132 (I was sick when I took the final exam). So I'm right on track and can boast a senior standing next semester. With that same grace that got me through the past five years, I WILL graduate this year.

My cousins here in Paranaque have been great and game hosts over these past days. I'm thankful that I got to hang out with them and catch up on all the lost years between us. Plus, Ate Ella is one awesome cook and I've been so well-fed that the internship left no physical damage on me. I've learned so much from Ate Renee, who is a Christian too and a pastor. I am somehow thankful that she pushed me into doing nightly devotions and pushed me into talking about things I didn't want to talk about. Some of my issues don't weigh as heavily now and I think me and God are on speaking terms again. Rather, I'm on speaking terms with Him again. Still very whiny though, and still a lot of stubborness and more rebellious thoughts but it's a start.

I'm thankful that i'm spending my summer at home with my family.

I'm thankful that I was able to prepare a sort of timeline for the dance ministry trainings and practices, as well as get some contacts for materials and media. I'm hoping Pastor Ruth Garcia at COP can give us some training or will allow us to train with their dance team some time.

I'm thankful for last Saturday's bowling witrh the gals, even if I did miserably in the second game. Ann, Apple and Nellie, we should do it again some time.

Most of all, I'm thankful that I have this sense of peace over a particular area of my life. I've been worrying about it for ages, even crying over the person and making huge mess of my brains. I'm not sure what triggered a release of the heaviness and I feel odd that life is a little lighter, but I'm still thankful about it. I still cry over it in my talks with God but the hole gapes less.

I am reading the journal of this drug addict who became a Christian and clean. This guy was calling her and she was sorely tempted to just give him a spin and go date him because she hadn't dated in a while. But she knew the guy was all wrong for her and how things would end badly. Yet she still longed. She was really wrestling over it, and so she calls her bestfriend and her bestfriend says. "Well, do you want the hit or do you want the serenity?" In the end, the author admitted she just wanted the hit.

I had to grin when I read that. I think the problem with me is that I want a hit too. You know, a little drama in my life, especially in this area of life. So God preserve me. I have no "chemical preservatives" to do so myself.

Thank You.