Girl thinks out loud

I’ve been thinking a lot (and for a long time) about myself and my being a woman and what that’s supposed to mean, if anything. Did God just process this statistically and figured a good sample spread would be a 50-50 split between the sexes and there’s this randomization scheme in heaven where I was randomly picked to be a woman, whatever that may mean?

Of course that doesn’t fit in with how deliberately and wisely planned the rest of creation is and how God is an eternal, powerful, wise Being who is so other worldly as to strike fear in the heart of me. The good sort of fear of course. The honoring, respecting and loving sort of fear.

I’ve mentioned that this “What is a woman of God? Who is this woman? Why is she a woman?” phase has been ongoing for quite sometime now. I don’t have all my answers down yet and I suspect I won’t completely understand this until I’m face to face with my Savior. But I’m going to think out loud here and share the lessons so far.

Most important thing I’ve learned to date is from the book of Genesis (and hulled by reading a lot of other books on being a woman, dating and marriage). God created woman by taking a rib out of Adam and forming her.

“And the rib, which the LORD God had taken from man, made he a woman, and brought her unto the man.” (Genesis 2:22)

It took me a long time for it to sink in that: 1. God deliberately makes a woman and 2. Eve was a woman before being called a woman by Adam.

“And Adam said, This is now bone of my bones, and flesh of my flesh: she shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of Man.” (Genesis 2:23)

The first point means my sexuality is not an accident. God initiated it, God created it. In the same way that He has lovingly created me to be a melancholic, neat freak, book geek, He has created me a woman. There has got to be a purpose to this, a uniqueness in how I am to reflect His glory to the world and how I was created to respond to God, to men and to other women. This was something Carolyn Mahaney talked about in one of the sermons I downloaded from the Council of Biblical Manhood and Womanhood, but what can I say, I’m a slow learner.

The second point means I am a woman with or without a man, with or without the clothes/make-up. The environment I grew up does not make me any less or more a woman than I was created to be. So while we have varying degrees of kakikayan, there isn’t a cut-off that determines that you are a woman. Created and raised in different countries and domestic situations does not change this fact either. I am not more of a woman if my mother allowed me to experiment with her make-up and wear her high heels when I was five and I’m not any less of a woman if I climbed trees, scraped my knees raw and enjoyed biking (yes, some of our relatives were aghast to know I did these things!). My femininity doesn’t rest on the fact that I was dressed in, uhm, dresses and given dolls and was encouraged to play house, bake cookies, etc. From the very start of my existence, I was created to be a woman. I am a woman.

This has been all incredibly freeing for me and has given me a fresh spark of hope. But, I do apologize, I have to go check on my widdle project now. Will write on this more soon.